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Umfundi othile eFlorida, ngokusobala elinyazwe okuhlangenwe nakho okuthile komuntu siqu, uyabhala ekhononda, “Uma ngeba impahla ethengiswayo yenikeli, ngiyisela futhi ngiyajeziswa; kodwa uma ngeba uthando lomfazi womunye, ngikhululekile.” Lona umbono oyiphutha ovamile ezingqondweni zabantu abaningi wokuthi uthando, njengempahla ethengiswayo, lungaba “ukwebiwa. Eqinisweni, izifunda eziningi ziye zashaya imithetho evumela umonakalo ¡°ukuhlukaniswa kothando¡±.Kodwa uthando aluyona into yokuthengisa; into yangempela ayikwazi ukuthengwa, ithengiswe, idayiswe noma yebiwe. Kuyisenzo sentando, ukuguquka kwemizwelo, ukushintsha kwesimo sobuntu.Lapho indoda noma inkosikazi “intshontshwa” ngomunye umuntu, lowo myeni noma umfazi wayesekulungele ukweba, kakade wayesethambekele kumngane omusha. “Isigebengu sothando” sasithatha kuphela okwakulindele ukuthathwa, esasifuna ukuthathwa.Sivame ukuphatha abantu njengempahla. Size sikhulume nangezingane “ezingezabazali” bazo. Kodwa akekho “ongowomunye” omunye. Umuntu ngamunye ungowakhe, futhi ungokaNkulunkulu. Izingane ziphathiswe abazali bazo, futhi uma abazali bazo bengabaphathi kahle, umbuso unelungelo lokuzisusa ekuphathweni kwabazali bazo.Iningi lethu, lapho sisebancane, laba nesipiliyoni sokuthi isithandwa senhliziyo siphucwa umuntu othile okhangayo nothandeka kakhulu. Ngaleso sikhathi kungenzeka ukuthi sasimcasulile lo mgadli kodwa njengoba sikhula, sabona ukuthi isithandwa sasingakaze sibe ngesethu kwasekuqaleni. Kwakungeyena umhlaseli owadala ikhefu, kodwa ukuntuleka kobudlelwane bangempela.Phakathi, imishado eminingi ibonakala ihlukana ngenxa "yeqembu lesithathu". Nokho, lokhu kuwukukhohlisa ngokwengqondo. Lona omunye wesifazane noma enye indoda imane nje iyizaba zokuchitha umshado owawusulahlekelwe ubuqotho bawo obubalulekile.Ayikho into eyize nezilimazayo ukwedlula umunyu wothando oludelelekile, umuzwa wokuphindisela wokuthi omunye “ungene phakathi” kwakhe nothandekayo. Lokhu kuhlale kuwukuhlanekezelwa kweqiniso, ngoba abantu ababona izithunjwa noma izisulu zabanye bangabantu abakhululekile, besebenzela ikusasa labo ngokuhle noma okubi.Kodwa isithandwa noma umngane womshado owaliwe akanakukwazi ukukholelwa ukuthi othandiweyo wakhe umfulathele ngokukhululekile¡ª ngakho-ke uthi izinto ezimbi noma imilingo kumuntu oxoxa naye. Umbiza nge-hypnotist noma isela noma isigebengu. Nokho, ezimweni eziningi lapho umuzi uphukile, ukugqekezwa sekuqale kudala ngaphambi kokuba kuvele noma yimuphi “umuntu wesithathu” endaweni yesigameko.